When I was a young boy, about eight years old, my family and I went on a holiday to the beach in the Florida Panhandle. As I was very young, I did not know how to swim at the time. Although I did not know how to swim, I definitely enjoyed the beach. There were many things there besides the ocean.
“What else is there besides the ocean?” you might ask. The beach is there, of course. Additionally, there are very many women and girls. I was never uninterested in girls. Rather, you could say I have always liked the fairer sex. I am confident a girl my age at the time would have noticed the men and boys instead. But I am not a girl, so I noticed the females. Another, and apparently very popular, ...view middle of the document...
I thought as hard as I could and finally thought of a great way to get my parents to buy the surfboard for me, the non-swimmer. This great way should be well-known to you as, I am sure, everyone in history has persuaded their parents to do something by using this method. What is this wonderful method? I cried and cried and cried until Dad bought the board.
Wow! I was so happy. Dad told me that I could carry the board but I was forbidden to take it into the water. I was not even allowed to stand in the water. That suited me just fine. I was quite happy to walk—strut, really—up and down the beach. I did not actually say it, but I was rehearsing these words in my mind: “Hey, girls! Look at me. I’m cool. Don’t hang out with those other boys. I’m your guy!”
This was fine and I was happy about it. This happiness lasted approximate thirty minutes. Then I noticed two very important things. The first thing was the girls were hanging out with the guys who had surfboards, but those surfboards had just come out of the water. The second was my parents were asleep on their beach towels.
“Aha!” I said to myself. “Now’s my chance.” I quietly walked down the beach to where the girls who I thought were the prettiest were gathered around one of the actual surfers. I then put my surfboard on the water and sat down on the board. The waves pushed me back and forth.
“So far, so good,” I was convinced. A few minutes later, the waves started to take me away from the beach. I was not...